"My daddy died," the little boy told the group of children meeting at the Children's Bereavement Center of South Texas. The boy had been coming to the Center for months, but had never before shared his story. He told the other children how he found his father, who had a heart attack, dead on the family's kitchen floor. Then he began to weep.

Martha J. Atkins '91, the center's founder and executive director recalls that she held her breath and prayed the other children would offer him support.

"One boy told him, 'It's okay. My daddy died, too,'" Atkins recalls. "Another boy said, 'You know, some people make fun of it, but I think it's okay for a boy to cry.' Then, this little 4-year-old girl walked over to him and gave him her candy bar. A space had been created for the boy and the kids just loved him."

"After about 10 minutes of sitting together silently, one of the children said, 'Can we go play basketball now?' And I said, 'Yes, of course we can!'"

Atkins knows that kids handle grief differently than adults. Because of that, adults often struggle to help children after the loss of a loved one.

The genesis of the Bereavement Center occurred while Atkins was working as a child life psychology specialist. On several occasions, she counseled children dealing with the death of a sibling. Parents would ask her who to go to for continued assistance. Basically, Atkins says, there was no one in South Texas providing help for children who had experienced the death of a sibling or a parent.

Those experiences were the catalyst for a master's project in educational psychology she completed at UT-San Antonio. She outlined a proposal for developing the Bereavement Center and earned an "A." A note from her professor that said, "You should pursue this" accompanied Atkins graded work. So she did.

"The day I unlocked the door on November 4, 1997, for the first group meeting, I thought, 'I am amazed I'm standing here. I did it. We're starting groups tonight,'" Atkins says.

Launching the Bereavement Center was no easy task. Atkins put everything else aside and, with no financial backing, began working out of her bedroom, using her home address and telephone number as the center's. She recruited a board of directors, gained nonprofit status, found temporary office and meeting space, and began to raise money for the center's work. She also recruited volunteers she could train to provide help, free of charge, to children dealing with the death of a parent or sibling.

Atkins, who earned a Bachelor of Arts in psychology with a music minor at Southwestern, says that a child life psychology internship she completed at Children's National Medical Center in Washington, D.C., just after graduating from SU in 1991, launched her career. She applied for the internship with the help and encouragement of Douglas Hooker, professor of psychology at Southwestern.

Currently, Atkins focuses nearly all her energy on the Bereavement Center. However, she makes time to actively participate in the music ministry at Colonial Hills United Methodist Church.

"Music is a wonderfully expressive tool for me," Atkins says. "It helps me keep a balance in my life." She has even written a children's song called, "On My Island," which her friend Jim Newton recorded with Paul Stookey–the "Paul" of Peter, Paul and Mary.

Atkins biggest challenge right now is finding a permanent home for the center. The center's offices are temporarily located at Santa Rosa Rehabilitation Clinic and group meetings are held at two San Antonio churches.

"Ten years from now, my dream is that the center will be viable and vital," Atkins says. "We'll have a home of our own, we'll be a trusted community resource for children and families, and we'll be conducting outreach and crisis intervention. The potential here to be of service to kids and families is huge."

Martha was recently named the 2003-2004 Counselor of the Year by the Texas Counseling Association.  She also passed a national certification exam in Thanatology (a specialization in death, dying, and bereavement) from the Association of Death Education and Counseling.  Two years ago, the Children's Bereavement Center purchased and moved into a "beautiful" 3-story historic near downtown San Antonio, where roughly 140 bereaved children are seen each month.